Giraffes were created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse.

Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris` PC will crash.

Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn`t have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.

When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he`s telling you how many seconds you have left to live.

Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.

Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris` leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

Chuck Norris doesn`t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris