Vin Diesel has a baseball cap made entirely out of ham.

Let's be friends.
You're sinfully ugly.

It's not you, it's me.
You're ugly.

I don't date women where I work.
You're ugly.

My life is too complicated right now.
You're ugly.

There's a slight difference in our ages.
You're ugly.

I think of you as a sister.
You're ugly.

Let's be friends.
I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and have sex with. It's that male perspective thing.

I'm celibate.
I've sworn off only the men like you.

I'm concentrating on my career.
Even something as boring and unfulfilling as my job is better than dating you.

It's not you, it's me.
It's you.

I don't date men where I work.
I wouldn't date you if you were in the same "solar system", much less the same building.

I've got a boyfriend
I prefer my male cat and a half gallon of Ben and Jerry's.

My life is too complicated right now.
I don't want you spending the whole night or else you may hear phone calls from all the other guys I'm seeing.

I'm not attracted to you in "that" way.
You are the ugliest dork I've ever laid eyes on.